Why Is That Old Person Driving So Fast?!?

Ohhh...

Things I Have Learned From Movies: Chapter One: Movie Musicals

"Some say that as we grow up, we become different people at different ages, but I don't believe this. I think we remain the same throughout, merely passing in these years from one room, to another, but always in the same house."
             Perhaps one of the most disturbing musicals of all time "Peter Pan" featuring Mary Martin is what I would describe as a plague of unfortunate events. Just in case you didn't guess Mary Martin is a girl who is playing the role of Peter Pan a boy. Now this in most cases wouldn't be a problem unless you're a child that gets confused easily (me). I don't know how long it took me to figure out there was a slight switcharoo in gender roles, but the scene I am about to describe did not help my simple stupidity one bit. Enter a song entitled "Oh My Mysterious Lady" sung by the most flamboyant Captain Hook ever to be portrayed, Cyril Ritchard. In this perfomance Peter and Hook play sort of a sexual game of cat and mouse , the mysterious lady being Peter Pan..... Let me explain....Mary Martin (actress) is playing a guy (Peter) who is pretending to be a woman (mysterious lady) who seduces a guy (captain hook) who pretends to like mysterious lady, but actually likes men. It's probably easier just to watch...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1vuk3jyRzlw

This musical has helped me learn some things in life can be a bit confusing, but just because they are doesn't mean they shouldn't be.  

OMG just googled Mary Martin, and found out she was a lesbian, this just got crazier!

"Such stupidity is without equal in the whole history of human relations."

             The first thing I learned from Gigi was.. Oh wait! Who is that charming old man in the top hat? Listen to that lovely voice singing!  What do-eth my ears protest!? It may be one of the first pedofile-esqe songs ever written, "Thank Heaven For Little Girls" 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CRnbtRPC6v4

with lyrics including "Each time I see a little girl about five or six or seven I can't resist the joyous urge" hmmm...Perhaps the first thing we all learn from watching Gigi is that times have changed, and maybe just maybe watching an elderly gentleman sing about how "little girls grow up in the most delightful way" might not be the best choice of lyrics in this modern age. Now don't get me wrong, back in 1958 we'd all be whistling this tune! In fact... I can't seem to...get it out of my head...As for now let's all sit back, relax, and leave this disturbing song to an age of innocence that didn't seem to mind "their little eyes so helpless and appealing." 

And lastly always remember that when eating ortolan the bones don't matter.

"Raspberries!"

One of my favorite scenes in this comedy delight features the kind of creativity I wish I possessed. With just a little bit of thought a dance is made, and a pretty neat one at that.  Though I have never personally tried to start this rhythmic majesty at a party (for one thing I don't attend many parties) The Tapioca is pretty much the coolest thing anyone could possibly learn. 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PvV8A_Nw0Xk